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How to Surround Yourself with the Right People

Like it or not, the people in our lives have a huge impact on our choices and success. If you are surrounded by negative people with a can't-do attitude, you will eventually begin acting the same way. Instead, if you surround yourself with positive people who approach things confident that they can solve them, that will rub off on you.

Motivational speaker Jim Rohn has a famous theory that we become the average of the five people we spend the most time with. The people you are closest to can affect your way of thinking, self-esteem, and decisions. While everyone is their own person, you are more affected by those closest to you than you think.

If Rohn's theory is correct, think about the five people you are with the most, on a personal and a professional level. Would the thought of being the average of these people make you happy, sad, or worried? It can be a scary thought to many people. Take some time to evaluate the five people you work most closely with and the people you are closest to in your personal life. Do you see them as someone you could aspire to be, a crutch, or dead weight? This can help you determine if you are surrounded by the right people. But, how do you find these people? Here are some tips to help you find the right people to surround yourself with.

Where Are You Now?

The first thing to do is take a critical look at the people in your life and what they add or subtract to your life. A good way to examine this is to think about your conversations with each of these people. Bob Proctor has said, "Left to their own devices, would they be more likely to talk about people or ideas? Do they encourage you to think big or to play small? Are they striving to improve their own life?"

If you are trying to become successful in your real estate investments, finding a mentor who has already achieved what you wish to accomplish will help guide you as you get going. While it can be nice to be the smartest person in the room, you should look for people who are smarter than you, because they can help you grow.

Where do You Want to Go?

To help you get where you want to go, you should try to associate with a certain mixture of people who will help you along the way. Since you are the average of the five you are closest to, try to add one of each of these types of people into your inner circle:

The dreamers, who are focused on their success. They do not need to be in your industry; simply being around successful people can make you want to succeed too.

The people who are always striving to learn and improve themselves. They want to make a difference in the world and being around them can help you want to learn too. Picking up their drive to learn and improve is a great way to help you succeed in your investments and life.

To branch off of the learners is the inquisitive people who are always asking questions. Questions about their business, selves, goals, and life. Having someone who is asking the right questions can help you by bringing you different angles than you may have considered, helping you succeed overall.

Successful people are able to make decisions quickly, going with their gut, even if they do not have all of the information yet. They do not wait to get the other pieces of data to come in, they act quickly on what they have in front of them. This can be a difficult trait to learn but being able to just go with your gut and not second-guessing yourself is key to being successful. For example, you find a property that is bursting with potential, but you may not have completed all of your due diligence yet. You know that if you wait, someone else is going to snatch up that property, so you go with your gut and put in the offer and end up with a highly lucrative property in the end.

Positivity and negativity are contagious, so surrounding yourself with positive people is another key to success for you.

Networking to Achieve Your Goal

You know the types of people you need to surround yourself with, now you just need to find them. Through networking, you can find the right people to help you achieve success.

When you are working with anyone, it is important to remember that a "me first" attitude is going to backfire on you. Relationships are give and take, and if you only take you are being a negative influence and one of the types of people who other successful people will not want around.

Combining multiple strategies in your networking can help you cast a net wide enough to meet the right people. You do not need to rely solely on big gatherings, you can also use social media and other digital means to help find the right people.


Green, Leon. “4 Networking Tips to Help Real Estate Investors Grow Their Inner Circle.” Green Residential, 16 Jan. 2020,

Groth, Aimee. “You're The Average Of The Five People You Spend The Most Time With.” Business Insider, Business Insider, 24 July 2012,

Proctor, Bob. “How to Surround Yourself with the Right People.” Proctor Gallagher Institute, 24 Sept. 2018,

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